Building Balance for the Busy Woman with Kelly Hubbell

Looking for the village that IG keeps telling you is a thing? How do we get it all done in a day (without burning out!)? Need to figure out how to ask for support? Kelly Hubbell, Founder and CEO of Sage Haus is here today to help make the possibility of outsourcing (that's right, outsourcing!) support systems seem a little easier. If you're a busy mom juggling all the things, this one's for you. 

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Transcript

Ryann (00:01.218)
Hi Kelly, welcome to the Raising Wild Hearts podcast.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (00:05.326)
Thanks for having me. So happy to be here.

Ryann (00:08.0)
Yeah, so happy you're here. I'm happy we got to chat a little bit before we hit record. And today this conversation for me is so much about abundance. When I kept like writing notes and thinking about this topic, I just like abundance of time, abundance of money, abundance of energy kept coming up for me. And we all want those things. We all want all three of those things. And so oftentimes,

we as moms can find ourselves in this kind of hamster wheel feeling like there's never enough. there will, when will there be enough? And we're kind of like pushing to the next thing. And that might even be just like day to day. And I know how everybody feels that like, my God, I'm so in the trenches right now. So I want to kick off the conversation and ask you, why do we feel so overloaded with

stress and overwhelm.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (01:10.9)
my gosh, good question. think a couple of really great things that you touched on, but mainly let's start with, yeah, why do we feel so overwhelmed? And I think it's really what it comes down to is up until now, our society and culture has told us as young moms and those of us in like, especially the millennial generation that we can have it all and

what we're realizing is that is absolutely not the case and like something's got to give. And so I think this idea of balance and having, you know, this perfect sort of harmony between work and life and all of these things, like something's got to give. And, and so that's why we're here. We're here because society and culture has told us one thing, but like the reality is another, and we're sort of grappling with, wait, how is this my reality? This isn't what

what someone told me it would be like when I got to this stage in my life. And so, I mean, yes, I'm excited to dive in more with you on all of the abundance that you want to talk about because, you know, that's why I am here. That's why I started Sage House and certainly one of the core values both, you know, for me and for my company now is in helping families.

find more time and energy and honestly wealth creation across the board because all of those things can be realistic.

Ryann (02:52.075)
Yes, please. Yes, we want more of that. So yeah, I'm really excited to get into that too. I want to talk about mental load specifically, because I know everybody listening, most of us here, we have like the dentist appointment in our mind, and we have the list of groceries and the list of household necessities that we need. And did we remember paper towels? And my gosh, we need more milk. And so and so needs to be picked up at 430.

But so-and-so needs to be picked up at 3 30. How are we gonna juggle that? La la la la la la la and on and on there's more and so there's this mental load that we are constantly carrying Some of us like on paper on checklists. I'm like a put it in my brain kind of a girl Although I am like getting better at writing it down. So let's talk about Mental load what the heck is it and why are we the only ones who seem to be carrying it and why don't

Kelly (Sage Haus) (03:28.932)
Okay.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (03:51.396)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (03:51.952)
our husbands in particular seem to be carrying the same mental load as us. What you think about that?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (03:58.848)
Mm Yeah. Love this topic. Let's do it. so yeah, I think you defined it really well. Mental load, right? It's like all of those things that we take on to make sure that ourselves and our family is thriving. you know, the way that it, this sort of surfaced in my own life, and this was before I knew the term was called mental load, right? It was like, I, I really hit my ceiling.

and my bandwidth was completely maxed out after we had our second. So I have three kids. Born within a four year timeframe. but it was really after we had my second, I was able to hold it together really well on my first. And then once I had my second, was like, my gosh, I'm drowning and I'm overwhelmed and like, cannot keep up. And this was with childcare. So like, keep in mind, like I had full-time childcare, but I was still feeling like.

why can't I feel like I can breathe? Because I was still managing all of those things, that mental load for the family, all of the things people need from meal prep and systems to all of the laundry, to making sure people were in the right place at the right time, that we were like healthy and taken care of and all of those things. And so I realized that what I did, because I am of someone who writes things down and I'm like a very systems oriented person is

I immediately took to my spreadsheet. And what I did was I made this huge list of all of the things that I was doing to manage my household. And because I just thought, gosh, if I can just write this all down, then maybe this will help me get some sort of epiphany on how do I solve this? Because this is just too much. But really, how much am I doing? Why do I feel so crazy? By going through this exercise, I realized that I was spending 22 hours a week

Ryann (05:50.454)
Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (05:56.164)
managing my household, like you said, buying paper towels, wiping down counters, making sure the dog gets walked. Managing my household on top of my full-time job. And that was like a light bulb because it was like, oh, no wonder I'm feeling so burnt out and I'm on this path to somewhere I don't want to be because my resentment is rising to your point toward my spouse. I'm feeling just like I don't

You know, I'm not feeling as joyful as I wanted to feel in motherhood. And so that moment was pivotal in that I took that list to my partner. And this is like, I think kind of answers your question on like, how come our partners don't see and don't understand the load because they can't see it because a lot of times it's invisible, right? So it's invisible. until we make it visible,

which is like that first step on like, hey, I know you probably can't see all these things I'm doing, but this is all the stuff I'm doing. And I think that was so eye opening for my partner that he looked at that list and he said, huh, this looks like a part-time job. And I said, well, that's because it is.

Ryann (07:09.495)
Totally, at least. Yeah, yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (07:15.054)
So that was like the turning point for me and a very just like pivotal moment in my life, my career, my relationship to say, you know what? 99 % of the things on this task list don't need to be done by me. And by the way, this is a job. This is adding value to our household. And like I am willing to...

Find someone to be a part my village and support my family because that's what we need in this season of life.

Ryann (07:51.682)
Yeah, totally. So we had our toddler in two different part-time preschools, and one of them being 20 minutes away. And we just had to go to this preschool because it's my favorite and it's the best and whatever. So we did. And I found myself driving in the middle of the day for an hour.

with a whiny, hungry, kind of tired toddler just being like, my god, this sucks so bad. And I was on a walk with a girlfriend. And she was like, you know, like that hour of driving really isn't best utilized by you. And I was like, you know what? You are so right. So I found a babysitter who happened to be very responsible and et cetera and checked all the boxes. And she started making the drive.

to this 20 minute preschool for my toddler, which he loved and she loved because she was making money and I loved because I didn't have to do the drive anymore. And so what you're saying reminds me of my story just on a bigger scale. And so we can take all these little things that we have and add those up, get them on paper like you said, and go, how can we outsource this? Right?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (09:10.596)
Mm hmm. Yes. And I think, first of all, claps snaps for you. I think sometimes isn't it funny that other people like a friend can just see that in us and they're like, wait, how come you haven't considered the solution? And that is, to be honest, like the biggest point of feedback that I get when I jump on a calls with busy moms with busy dads with

Ryann (09:23.084)
Totally.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (09:35.32)
People who join my weekly informational calls to learn more about Sage House and recruiting services. And literally, the most repeated thing is, I didn't know this was an option. I didn't even realize this could be a solution for me. And that's not uncommon because, again, up until now, we've been told, this is just the way it is. It's really hard. You've just got to get through it.

Ryann (09:48.364)
Right.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (10:03.332)
and you're supposed to do it. And by the way, if you need help, you just need more childcare. Well, guess what? That's not just the case. Like, yes, do we need childcare so that for those of us who are working nine to five, yes, we need childcare from nine to five. But what about the hours before that? And after that, when we are trying to squeeze in and multitasking, all of those other things done that we couldn't get done during our workday.

But what we really want to be doing is being present with our kids and with our family and spending quality time together. So I'm guessing in your scenario, your child who you were like kind of dragging back and forth from was also so much happier because they were spending quality time with you and not just in the car. you know, it's like.

Ryann (10:49.933)
Totally, and it wasn't like frustrated mommy. It was like happy mommy, because I didn't have to do the drive, you know? Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (10:55.54)
Exactly. Yes. And like these are the points where now I'm guessing like this was an invaluable investment for you and your family. And it's not a question of how much does this cost? It's how much is it going to cost me if I don't? What's the opportunity value of this hour?

Ryann (11:15.271)
Yes. Yep. I was.

walking with the same girlfriend and I was telling her how life-changing it was and I was like I just feel like every time take my money just like take my money take my money it it was worth every penny and so much more like I would have actually paid more than I was paying to have this wonderful girl drive my son to his preschool and on that note I would like to say

As somebody who's building a business building a podcast, know kind of out there in the world and still like Kind of a stay at home mom. All three of my kids are in school. Like we've got child care They're they're all in school full time and I like when that first happened I was like thinking that it was gonna be like rainbows and butterflies and like lounging and I was like, Shit by the time I get the house cleaned in the morning and then did it and do all the things I was like

my god, it's pickup time already. And I, you know, I had kind of a scarce mindset and I've worked on that over the past like few months. but at first I was like, this is not as much time, freedom, flexibility as I had originally thought, which to your point is like, everybody says, just get childcare, get a nanny. And that's not necessarily it. So for somebody who's listening, Kelly, and is like outsourcing, wait a minute, what the heck? I can't afford that.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (12:31.672)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (12:45.839)
I don't know. This is sounds expensive I don't think this is an option for me. Maybe them but not me. What would you say to that person?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (12:54.55)
Mm-hmm. I would say in the nicest way, you are wrong. I would say, here's what I would say. No, seriously, though. Let's talk about this. Let's talk about privilege. think, you know, probably there are people listening to this thinking, this rich white woman is telling me that I should just throw money at my problem. OK, sure. Let's talk about that. Yes.

It is absolutely a privileged position to be in. Whether we are able to afford one hour for someone to help us with a commute or two hours for someone to babysit while we go on a date night with our spouse. Or in my case, I started with a household manager, house manager who took 10 or 12 hours a week off of things off my plate. OK, sure. It is absolutely a privilege.

What I will also say is it's okay if you have the means to spend the money on an hour or 10 hours or 20 hours, if that's the right thing to do for you and your family. And when you think about it, again, the opportunity costs, but also the cost of burnout, the cost of resentment, the cost of, you know, all of these

Our mental health. Yeah, I Know it's funny you say that I say to people I'm like could house manager Be the solution instead of couple therapy perhaps it might be It could be Exactly therapy is expensive and a chief and either is a divorce divorce attorney and so yeah, I mean I think the thing is is

Ryann (14:20.171)
Divorce? I mean, for real.

Ryann (14:33.099)
Right? Perhaps. Probably less money. Could be less money, even when you think about it like that, or maybe the same. Yeah.

Totally.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (14:51.376)
We need to think about it from a point of if I if I can do this for my family and I'm in a season of life where I need more support, it's OK. And then the other thing I will say is this isn't just for the rich and famous anymore. And that is part of the reason I I am here and I started Sage House and I left my corporate job, by the way, last year to go full time on this movement, because I absolutely think that

finding your village and finding more support in your life is more affordable, attainable, and approachable than people think. This is no longer for the Kardashians of the world, okay? This is for normal people.

who need more support and who are willing to consider hiring someone on a part-time basis, a small basis to support their family. And I will say one more thing, which is our economy today is already supporting this concept of outsourcing, right? So we are already spending money on laundry services, grocery delivery services,

Ryann (16:07.027)
Amen.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (16:07.774)
meal prep boxes that come to our house. Like we're starting to piecemeal all of these things together and duct tape it together. But really, if you were to look at how much money you're spending on takeout, how much money you're spending on these services, you might realize, for an additional marginal cost, I could actually have a real person in my home helping me with laundry, meal prep, running errands.

Amazon returns, like all of these things that I need help with. And that could make a lot of sense.

Ryann (16:45.163)
Yeah, and somebody to like.

bounce ideas off of somebody to actually talk with face to face. Like when you were talking, I was like, yeah, I just paid a guy like a 10 extra dollars because I forgot to add something to my grocery delivery the other day. And I'm like on the text app, like begging him, please go back and get that can of soup. I needed it for a recipe tonight. I'll tip you extra. And he's like, okay. And I was like, my God, he did it. But you know, it really kind of opens up my mind to like, what else could I pay somebody for? What else could

allocate this money for because I am paying for delivery services. I rarely go to the grocery store anymore and that's by design. I don't want to. I don't want to. It's not a good use of my time. It doesn't bring me ease. It doesn't really bring me joy once in a while. Like yes and I'm like this is enjoyable but not every day. We've got five people in our house. We grow grocery shopping like every three days. I mean it's like okay we need more. Like so okay I love this conversation.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (17:24.772)
Mm-hmm. Yeah!

Kelly (Sage Haus) (17:41.624)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (17:48.316)
Another thing I was thinking when you were talking is like we have been and I mean women have been kind of taught indoctrinated to be this kind of stressed

you know, pent up version of themselves who has to do it all, this kind of martyr archetype. And that archetype came into mind. I'm very familiar with said archetype. And so I picture myself in different seasons of my motherhood. And I really was struggling and didn't know how to ask for help, didn't know who to ask for help. And like really didn't even know it was an option because in my family and

Kelly (Sage Haus) (18:11.299)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (18:33.647)
my matrilineal lineage, it's like, this is what we do. We push through, we persist, we get up and go, go, go. And so I had this kind of like, I have to like hustle for it, even if it was just at home. And this was me not even having a full time job. This was me just like, just taking care of the house. And I was like, my God, this sucks so bad. Why isn't anyone talking about

Kelly (Sage Haus) (18:35.32)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (19:03.767)
it like what the hell so do you see these women coming to you at their absolute widths end and this is like the next or the only option for them to like maintain some sort of sanity in their lives

Kelly (Sage Haus) (19:06.34)
Mm-hmm.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (19:21.644)
Yes. So short answer, yes. I think we are at the point of creating solution. Let's get into that in a second. But I think what you said completely resonates, I think, with every probably woman listening to this, which is busy has been successful. Busy has been successful. And we have been conditioned, once again.

conditioned to be martyrs and do it allers. And to your point, why are we like that? Because that's what we saw. That was what was modeled to us growing up. I know that I am, I am certainly, I'm certainly just like my mom. And what I saw was a mom who did it all, made it all happen.

worked from home, was president of the PTA, like did it all. like, you know what? What I saw was that that had very serious long-term chronic health ramifications for her. And when I caught myself being a do-it-aller, I took a really long hard look and said, do I want to be in that same state?

that I saw my mom in. Do I want to really like watch myself on a decline because I didn't take care of myself physically, emotionally, mentally? And I think that's what's happening now. Like this is a movement happening now. We're still very much at the forefront of it. moms, whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, all moms work, by the way, we are...

finally putting our foot down and saying, no thanks, not anymore. I don't want to do it all. I do not want to be a super mom. Stop calling me a super mom because I don't want to be a super mom. And I think that we are now at the point of looking for solutions and not just like exacerbating the problem. I think it's so easy to get on social and start doom scrolling and start looking at

Ryann (21:33.589)
Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (21:49.686)
like all of these jokes being made about moms and how hard it is. know, the chaperones of the world saying this is so hard, right? Like, why would you ever want to be a mom? You can doom scroll and you can go into a place of this is really hard and there are no solutions and this is just the way it is. Or you can start actually looking for solutions that work today.

Ryann (21:53.131)
Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (22:18.21)
The Fair Play Method came out almost 10 years ago and they are now still in a movement of couples and partners working together to share in the mental load. And now I will say, we're still not there yet. We've got decades and decades of reconditioning our own kids, our own children about how to share in the mental and physical load of a family and what that means. But until then, until we're like,

In this utopia world, which I don't know how long that's going to take, or robots are running our household, either way, I think we need solutions today. And that is what I am helping families with is let's find a solution today to get you relief and get you back to a point of feeling more present, feeling more joyful, and like spending time doing something that you want to do.

Ryann (23:13.677)
So I'm hearing you say that step one is like an audit. Like what's all this stuff I'm doing around the house? Like get it down, see what it is, and then perhaps picking the one, two, three, five low-hanging fruit and go, how can I ask for help with this, yeah? Perfect.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (23:31.054)
Yep, you got it. You got it. You nailed it actually. So there is a free quiz on my website and it's eight questions. It takes about two minutes. And that by taking that quiz, I will tell you how many hours you are spending today managing your household. I will give you a dashboard that shows how that time is being spent. And then I will make recommendations for you on your solution.

Should you potentially find and hire a house manager or family assistant? Or do you already have the support that you need and maybe you just need better systems around that support that you already have? So like those are sort of the two of the ways that people go. But you're right. The first thing is don't sit down with a blank spreadsheet like I did. I've already done the work for you. So like go take this quiz. It'll give you the answer to the test. And then what it will give you is it'll give you

Ryann (24:24.781)
Perfect.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (24:28.812)
my whole task list of all of the things that I did to, you know, I was doing in my household. It's pretty holistic actually. And that is the step of making the invisible visible.

And that's step one to having the conversation with your spouse or partner. Step one to having your own realization of, my gosh, I can't believe that I'm doing this. I'm holding this all together. And by the way, I'm amazing. But that's, yes, that's it. That's the first step. And then we can talk about what happens after that and what I.

what I've seen for solutions. But that's the initial step.

Ryann (25:17.677)
Perfect. So that's stagehouse.com. Is it on the home page?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (25:21.996)
Yeah, so if you go to mysagehouse.com and then it says take the quiz, there's like a little button at the top to take the quiz. And I also have this LinkedIn, my Instagram bio. So if you go to mysagehouse.com and you can click on take the quiz and yeah, bing, bang, boom.

Ryann (25:24.043)
My sage house, perfect.

Perfect.

Ryann (25:41.24)
Perfect. OK, so let's talk about those control freaks out there asking for a friend. We want it done the way we want it done, how we want it done in a certain order of things. And so what are you having to say to these control people who don't want to relinquish the, well, I want it done my way. Nobody else can do it like me.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (26:08.64)
Mm-hmm. Well, I first will say you're in good company because that's me. You just described me. And I will just say that relinquishing the control and fully handing over a mental load is certainly a mindset shift, but it is absolutely attainable for even the most type A, A plus plus.

And once you do it, you will never go back. let me, let me like deep dive. In fact, I have an entire blog post on my website all about how to outsource and get someone to do it quote my way. Right? Like, I think that's the thing. Like we're like, well, someone's not going to do it as well as I could do it. Or like, oh, by the time I tell them how to do it, I could just have done it myself. Well, yeah, that holds up for like the first time, but guess what?

Things like taking out the trash, running a load of laundry, the way that you like a specific room cleaned or dusted or vacuumed, or the way that you like to pick out your apples at the grocery store, whatever it is. I promise you, as silly as it might feel to tell someone how you like something done, that will serve you.

in the long run because you won't be spending your time worried about picking out apples without bruises. And guess what? As crazy as it sounds, someone else is capable of flipping your jeans inside out and washing them on cold. Like, I like hate to break it to you, but you're not the only one who can run your denims in the washing machine and then hang dry them. OK, think about it like and also can we just like

We are so good at delegating. is obviously what we're talking about here. It's the art of delegation. We are so good at delegating at work. Or in like with our kids or with our spouse, like we're so freaking good at this. We say, these are my needs and I am explicitly going to tell you how I want something done or how I want, this is the result I want. However you get there, here's what I want. But for some reason we have this like block.

Ryann (28:16.245)
Yep, that's exactly what I was thinking about. Yep.

Yep.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (28:38.254)
when it comes to running our household. And it literally makes no sense. It's like not practical. And so we got to just get over ourselves and say, you know what? I am the CEO of my home. I'm going to run my home like a business. And I am going to, again, and these are the systems that I was talking about, Create better systems to manage our home. Operationalize it. Do it just like you would at work.

so that you can free yourself up for things that you enjoy doing, that bring you more joy, that you're better at, your zone of genius, if you will, right? Than all of the other things that someone else can do.

Ryann (29:22.167)
Totally. Love it. This to me is like.

Personal growth 101 which is crazy because it's like oh, we're talking about hiring a household manager We're talking about like hiring, you know a village hiring people to help me meal prep or take my kids somewhere or whatever this or that and it's like this when we're having resistance to this conversation those of you listening who are like still feeling a little cringy if if Kelly hasn't Won you over yet? Like this is such a personal development conversation

Kelly (Sage Haus) (29:50.041)
Yeah.

Ryann (29:57.112)
And so if you are the person who finds yourself cringing right now ask yourself Why and double click on that? Where is this coming from? Is this a money mindset issue? Is this an abundance issue? Is this a worth issue? What is this right now for you? So I want everyone to ask themselves like what is coming up for me because this is some good good information for us to have about ourselves

Kelly (Sage Haus) (30:08.355)
Hmm?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (30:25.08)
Yes, it is. It is. I it is taking a really hard look at again, what do we really want for ourselves? It's interesting. I was just at a conference this last weekend, and we were talking about how the difference between men and women, frankly, is that men are able to

live their life from a place of "what do I desire?" whereas most women are living from a place of "how can I meet my obligations?"

Kelly (Sage Haus) (31:10.425)
And if we start to flip that on its head, how am I living from a place of what I desire?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (31:21.336)
then everything changes because we think I am, I have worth, I have desires, I am a person too. And what I really want for my life is XYZ. I really want to build that business or I really want to feel genuinely present with my kids instead of multitasking and doing all the other stuff. Whatever that is different for other people. For me, I just want to play more tennis, you know, like

How do we live from a different place and how do we really look at the societal expectations that are putting us in a box and blocking us from what we want to be, how we want to be living our life?

Ryann (32:10.317)
Totally. When my older two kiddos were really young, I want to say my middle one was like a baby. I was at a mommy and me group and I was like saying to a mom like, yeah, everything's fine. But just like, is my house ever going to be clean again? And she's like, no, it's not unless you hire someone to clean it. And I was like, well, that's not an option. And then like.

Years later, finally, I'm like, OK, cleaning the house isn't an option anymore. know, somewhere between the second and the third kid, let's call it, somewhere, somewhere in that third pregnancy realm. Actually, I think that's exactly where it was. Now that I'm now that I'm thinking back, I was like, this isn't happening anymore. I don't care if we have to not go out to dinner. Like, I mean, it was a very real conversation of like, I'm out. I'm out.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (32:39.254)
Mm-hmm.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (32:43.576)
Yes.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (32:47.278)
Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (32:57.443)
Yes.

Ryann (33:03.541)
Mama's not doing this anymore. I need help. And we, my husband and I, moved things around and figured out something to do so that we could have someone to clean our house because it was just no longer.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (33:12.046)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Ryann (33:17.093)
freaking option and so do not recommend getting to the point where you're like and crazy before you go and take this step but I knew I wanted someone to clean my house you know that always was like a wow that sounds really nice to have and so think about those nice to have things that you really want you want to play more tennis I want someone to clean my house I don't want to be driving an hour in the middle of the day all these things that can open us up to explore create lay in the

Kelly (Sage Haus) (33:19.364)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (33:46.88)
Meditate, it is that you want to do. Think about waking up and living your perfect life. It's something I think about so much. Maybe not your perfect life because nothing's perfect, but what about your perfect day? Let's start miniscule. Perfect morning. You go and watch the sunrise. You get your tumer glade at the corner thing. And this is my day. You go for your walk, and then you pick up a fresh bouquet of flowers, and you come home, and you

Kelly (Sage Haus) (33:59.556)
Sure. Sure.

Ryann (34:16.783)
just feel it's it's that feeling that we want to have that feeling of like, this is my life. And I love it.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (34:25.984)
Mm hmm. Yeah, no, think you're absolutely right. It's interesting that you sort of managed you went into what is your ideal day? That's actually the very beginning of like my home systems course that I teach is doing that. It's like. Let's jump ahead to what does a day in your life look like two months from now when we've set up the systems and got you the support that you need.

Ryann (34:40.3)
Yeah.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (34:53.844)
what does that day and week look like for you? And so I actually have people like, I have like a printable that's like, let's start from scratch. Cause I don't, I'm like, no one can open up their Google calendar or Outlook calendar and actually get anywhere. You have to like start with a blank slate. So I'm like, start with this blank slate. Mark off the things that are like non-negotiables. Like, yes, you got to get your kids to school at this time. got to pick somebody at this time, whatever non-negotiables. Cool. But then it's like, look at your day from like a totally

Ryann (35:06.647)
Totally. Totally.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (35:23.128)
blank slate. What could you be doing with your time? How do you want to be spending your time? And starting from there, I think the other thing you mentioned is working within your budget and making decisions that work for you. For so many of my clients, like they are starting really small, five hours a week, 10 hours a week. You know how much time you get? How much 10 hours a week is? Like, first of all, that gets you all your grocery shopping done, some meal prep.

all of your laundry done, errands run for you, gas in your car. And that means like, what would you do with 10 extra hours? That's, that is over an hour a day of extra. Would you finally like exercise? Would you finally spend more time with your partner? Would you start that podcast? You've been thinking about starting, you know? And then I think the other thing finally is like, as we think about

Ryann (36:01.133)
Wow.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (36:21.86)
barriers for why haven't I done this? A lot of people I talked to were like, why weren't you here five years ago? And I had young kids and I needed more help or whatever it was. like, why weren't you around when? Was this this crazy season of life? I think my goal is like in 10, 15, 20 years from now for this to just be an option that people consider. Like a house manager, a family assistant,

is the way that today people are thinking like, oh, this is a little taboo. I can't believe she has a house manager. Can you believe she has a house manager? It's probably the way our grandparents felt when the next door neighbor had a house cleaner, right? In the 50s, can you believe Olga got a house cleaner? You know what mean? And now it's like, oh yeah, I have somebody who comes to clean my house every other week. And it's like societally like fine and normal. You know what I mean? It's like so silly.

Ryann (37:00.458)
Right?

Ryann (37:06.061)
Totally. Totally.

Ryann (37:13.335)
Totally.

Ryann (37:20.225)
Yeah. Yeah.

How funny is that? my God. Well, I love that you're bringing it to the mainstream. I just am obsessed with this conversation. I feel like it opens so many doors for me. So many possibilities. Like the possibilities are endless. Like what else can I pay somebody to do? Like this is fun. Like what can I take off my plate? Because this is, this is the question for me. Like what does not need to be there that I don't want to be there that I feel grumpy about doing anyway? What's going to make me feel more ease?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (37:40.834)
Yes.

Ryann (37:52.748)
in my day-to-day life and that is exactly what you and Sage House are doing. So thank you so much. We're gonna follow you on Instagram, Kelly. We're gonna go to your website and take that quiz, mysagehouse.com. Where else can we follow along with the work that you're doing?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (38:08.066)
Yeah. So like I mentioned, I am on Instagram at my sage house. am on LinkedIn, Kelly Hubble, H-U-B-B-E-L-L. And really, like I mentioned, are a couple ways to start with me. Like either you realize, my gosh, this sounds rad. I would love a house manager. I want to explore that more. I have both a do it yourself guide that you can, you can, if you're curious, like, how could I maybe hire someone on my own?

I have a recruiting service. So from start to finish, I will find your modern Mary Poppins for you and your family. And then I also have this home systems piece. So for those of you who maybe already have help or after you find and hire someone and you need better systems in your home, I have a solution for that as well. So those are like kind of the ways you can work with me, where you can find me. And mostly I would just love to hear from you and

And if there's anything I can do, I mean, my goal is to have the biggest impact I possibly can. And that's why I left my corporate job last year, because I knew that I could make more of an impact on real people and real families doing this. And so far it's been so incredibly fulfilling and like, it really brings me true joy to help other families find the relief and joy that I am now feeling today. And so I've just, would love to help. So.

Hit me up.

Ryann (39:37.986)
Yeah.

The ripple effect of that is real. mean, imagine a bunch of relaxed, joyful moms walking around. I mean, imagine if there's no memes for that. There's no victim or pity party that we can jump on for that. And so imagine a world where the moms are happy, the moms are free, the kids are happy, the kids are free. And it's really, really a ripple effect. This is such a big, big conversation. We're not just talking about

Kelly (Sage Haus) (39:52.708)
Mm-hmm.

Ryann (40:08.735)
something like outsourcing and you know helping with the mental load we're talking about the happiness of your family for generations to come. So this is so important and thank you so much for the work you're doing. Now that we're wrapping up I'd love to ask you the three questions I ask everybody at the end of the interview and the first one is what's bringing you joy today.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (40:32.876)
Today, I'm really joyful about the second cup of coffee that I'm consuming on this call if you would know. Actually, I am just so happy to have the opportunity to connect with you, to be a part of your community, and for you to have the open-mindedness

of having this conversation because I think like this is the conversation that needs to be happening and so it brings me joy and validation but like it just um knowing that this message is resonating and like normalizing this and getting this out in the world brings me an immense amount of joy.

Ryann (41:20.927)
Amazing. What, if anything, are you reading right now?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (41:25.316)
gosh, I am on the Court of Thorns and Roses series. Okay, I know I'm always late to a party.

Ryann (41:30.805)
I just heard that on the Mel Robbins podcast. I'm late to the party too. She just had it on her top four book podcast list. I was like, okay, all right. Okay.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (41:35.512)
Okay. my God. So good. Okay. So, so, so good. So that's my, so I always have like a fiction and nonfiction going. So my, my before bed book is the Accord of Thorns and Roses. I'm on the third book right now. But the book that I have, I typically am, usually I do like an audio book too. And the one that I'm really excited about is actually,

Ryann (41:46.701)
Uh-huh.

Ryann (41:51.597)
Okay.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (42:03.244)
I've been listening to it on audio, but it comes out as we're recording this today, which is April 8th, 2025, is Dr. Morgan Cutlip's book, A Better Share is out. And that is about how to share in the mental load of your household and really more along the lines of like how to better relate to your partner and connect with your partner and have better sex.

if you can get if you can start sharing the mental load. like that is so good.

Ryann (42:33.943)
God.

Good, okay, that's on the list. All right, and the last question I have for you is who or what has taught you the most?

Kelly (Sage Haus) (42:39.319)
Mm-hmm.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (42:44.696)
Gosh,

Kelly (Sage Haus) (42:48.878)
So many people in my life. I feel like I've gotten me here, but I think.

I think I mentioned like my mom was a huge part of sort of teaching me all of the things that I wanted to be in a mom and all of the things that I didn't want to be in a mom. And so I think like, it's really important for us to take a long hard look at our mentors and the people who raise us and come before us and really think like, what do what parts of this do I want to take with me? And I think like that has been my biggest

learning. And then I've also just had some like really incredible mentors throughout my career in technology and software sales and people who have really taught me.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (43:41.142)
And now I'm tapping into those things on like how to build a business. And so I'm just really grateful for like every step. If you would have told me two years ago, three years ago that like I would be here right now, I would have laughed at you, right? Like I think it's just so incredible to think about like the way we are sort of like build our own experience and wind through life. anyway, just so many people, so many people.

Ryann (44:06.968)
love it. Thank you so much again for being here. This is a great conversation.

Kelly (Sage Haus) (44:11.758)
Thanks for having me.