Balancing Ambition, Wellness, and Abundance with Rebecca Whitman

Discover the secret to harmonizing the  delicate balance of abundance, beauty and joy with Magnetic Abundance Mentor, Rebecca Whitman! Rebecca walks us through her seven pillars of abundance, and how they can empower you to not just survive but thrive.

Learn more about Rebecca's work here. 

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Transcript

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Overcoming Overwhelm

Speaker 1 1:06

Joy is actually a paradigm shift . It's a decision , it is just a way of being where everything is just a privilege , and it's about gratitude and it's just about how we look at life that we get to be here we're so lucky just to be alive and be on the planet and we get to have all these great experiences and life is temporary , so why waste any more time not being in joy ?

Speaker 2 1:36

Welcome , revolutionary Mama , to the Raising Wild Hearts podcast . I'm Ryan Watkin , educator , mom of three , revel at heart and passionate soul , on a mission to empower and inspire you .

Speaker 2 1:51

Here we'll explore psychology , spirituality , parenthood and the intersection where they all come together . We'll discover how challenges can be fertile soil for growth and that even in the messy middle of motherhood , we can find magic in the mundane . Join me on my own personal journey as I talk to experts and share resources on education , creativity , self-care , family , culture and more . I believe we can change the world by starting at home in our own minds and hearts , and that when we do , we'll be passing down the most important legacy there is healing , and so it is . Hello , welcome back to the Raising Wild Hearts podcast , really excited to share another epic conversation with you guys . Today . I'm joined by Rebecca Whitman . We had an awesome conversation . We talked a lot about abundance . We talked about balance in the seven areas of our lives . She has what's called the seven pillars of abundance , so she really broke those down for us , which was really great . She's got a couple free gifts for you guys that she mentions throughout . I will also put them in the show notes so you can look below and just click on the links to find more about what she does . Towards the mid to end , I asked her about a program called Six Figure Side Hustle and she talks about the power of scheduling on a Sunday and keeping that time really sacred for yourself . So if you're a mama like me who might be overwhelmed , overworked , burned out , but you wanna get back to the ambitious you , the career-driven you , the you who is driven by creating something for the world and for yourself and to make some income , then you definitely want to check out her answer to the question that I asked her , because it's something that I always have my finger on the pulse of . And then also we talked about success being just our measure of joy in life , which was such a beautiful segue or just such a beautiful testament to this entire conversation . Sometimes I don't expect what people are gonna say that their definition of success is , and this one her answer about joy really surprised me and I really felt moved by it , because I think that so often we can get caught up in the day to day and the so-called maybe problems or issues that we're having . But she really talked about using joy as a meter for how successful we are , and I love that . So Rebecca is the Magnetic Abundance Mentor .

Speaker 2 4:43

She's an international bestselling author . She graduated with honors from Princeton University . She was awarded the Life Coach of the Year and empowered Woman of the Year by International Association of Top Professionals . La Weekly Magazine featured her as one of the top seven entrepreneurs to watch in 2023 . So she also hosts the number one , the 1% globally ranked Balanced , beautiful , abundant Podcast , which won the Positive Change Award . Her philosophy divides life into seven pillars of abundance , which include spiritual , physical , emotional , romantic , mental , social and financial . She helps people achieve balance within these seven areas so they can experience more fun and freedom in life .

Speaker 2 5:30

So you guys are gonna love this conversation . It's really great . It's super practical .

Speaker 2 5:38

Sometimes , when we think about abundance or magnetism , we can think that there's like this woo side of it , but the tips that she gives us are just truly gold and , honestly , like after this conversation , I felt really motivated and inspired just to pick one of the tips that she provided , because it like so many amazing takeaways are in this conversation . So if you really really wanna get into it , like get out your notebook and take some notes , because she's got a lot of different tips and tricks to help you align your life , and I know that we all need that . Maybe you're in the season that I am with little kids , maybe you're in a working season , maybe you're in a mothering season , maybe you're all of the above , and no matter which season of life you're in , this is going to be a super valuable conversation for you , so I'm really excited to share it . Get out your notebook If you're driving , just like , put a pin in it , you know , bookmark the time when you're really inspired of like , oh , I need to integrate that into my life Because , like I've mentioned before this season on the podcast , listening to and consuming information , bringing more input into our lives , can be very valuable , yes , and we need to take steps , take those concrete actions to integrate them in our lives . So I know I'm gonna take a couple things at least one of the things that Rebecca mentioned and integrate it into my life . Loved it , yeah . So enjoy this conversation .

Speaker 2 7:15

Check out the links below to learn more about Rebecca and her amazing work in the world . She's got a lot of different quizzes and different . She's got a free gift , which is a journal that she's passing along to you . She talks about the importance of a morning practice or really in any time practice . So if mornings don't work for you right now , then make it an evening practice . But one of the first steps that she talks about is awareness , and something that helps us become aware of what's going on internally is getting it down on paper . So enjoy that free gift , jump in the Raising Wild Hearts membership to become a founding member Also .

Speaker 2 7:53

I think this conversation is very timely , with the holidays coming up . As this is airing , we're probably just like knee deep in the holidays . We're just as we recorded today , we're about to inch up to there , we're mid-November , so we're getting there , and so I think one of the things that can come up for us in the holiday season unintentionally or just because maybe we're used to it or we've never felt or experienced anything else is that overwhelming urge to feel busy or like there's too much going on , or like we have all these obligations and that the calendar is too busy and the kids are eating too much sugar and it's too much , too much , too much . And so this is a very , very timely conversation to be balanced as you are navigating these waters of the holiday season with you and the ones you love . So enjoy this conversation and I cannot wait to see you in the membership . Email me hello at raisingwildheartspodcastcom to ask questions for our future guests or to give me ideas of future guests or to pitch yourself to be on the show , because I am scheduling conversations for the new year at this point and I'm so excited to bring you some of those conversations . So reach out , hello at raisingwildheartspodcastcom . Can't wait to talk to you . Enjoy this conversation .

Speaker 2 9:24

Hi Rebecca , welcome to the raisingwildhearts podcast . Hi Ryan , it's great to be here . Yeah , it's great to have you . I'm really excited to chat . You've got a number of amazing accolades . You help women go from overwhelm and burnout to an abundant , which I'm pretty sure we all want . We all want to feel balanced , beautiful and abundant . So I think this is a really , really important conversation and I'll start out by framing . I'm in a bit of an overwhelm season in my life and kind of riding the waves of what that feels like , and even day to day . Sometimes there's like a reprieve . That's just a very intense day for a lot of different reasons . And so let's talk about overwhelm first . Like what are you seeing when people are coming to you in this state of overwhelm ? What is like the immediate kind of like balm that we can put on that day to day , week to week , month to month ?

Speaker 1 10:36

The main thing with overwhelm is to shift from a scarcity mentality to an abundance mentality . Overwhelm is I don't have enough time , I don't have enough energy , I have too much going on , and that is scarcity . That is , I don't have enough of something right , whether it's time , whether it's energy , whether it's money , or I have too much right , too much going on , too many kids , too many people are pulling at me . So the opposite of scarcity is abundance . And to think of overwhelm as a sign of abundance , like you have all these great opportunities , you have all these people who want your attention , you have all these people who love you and need you , and it is absolute abundance to have overwhelm . The opposite of overwhelm is like sitting by yourself in a room watching Netflix all day by yourself , eating pizza and doing absolutely nothing , which it might be sounding nice for a break , but if that's your whole life , if you have nothing to do , nowhere to go , no one to connect with , no one to call back , that is complete and utter despair and boredom . So I like changing my I have to is to I get to like I have to take the kids to school , I have to clean a dirty diaper , versus I get to like do you know how many people , myself included , never had kids and wished for kids ? So it is definitely and I get to .

Overcoming Overwhelm, Finding Balance Tips

Speaker 1 12:15

And another thing that helps with overwhelm excuse me , I'm just waking up , I have my . My froggy morning voice is don't do anything out of fear , obligation or guilt , unless it really lights you up . Yep , they know to it , because women have such a hard time saying no and that also increases the overwhelm because we're doing so much and a lot of it we don't even want to be doing and that doesn't feel good . So unless something really lights you up , don't do it . Another thing to help with overwhelm is look at your schedule and if there's one or two things you could take off your schedule today that are not absolutely crucial to your wellbeing and your family's wellbeing , just go ahead and take them off your schedule . Slow down your pace and just enjoy the journey , because you know , before you know it , you'll be driving your kids off to college and you'll be like , wow , where did those 18 years go ? So just know that , like you said , ryan , it is a season , it will pass , and enjoy the journey .

Speaker 2 13:25

Yeah , I love that reframe from thinking about it as just an overabundance of love , excitement , you know , chaos , little voices , you know things going on in the home , because that's very much how I feel right now and to reframe that as like just this overabundance of joy because , you know , mostly kids are really , you know , especially when they're really young , connected to this joyous . You know part of them , like my two year old just everything is like the coolest thing in the world . It's inconvenient for me to stop and look at a butterfly cocoon for five minutes , but to him this is like the juice of life , like this is like what life is all about . So I really love that reframe . Great , great tips for how to just like ground back in when I think of saying no to anything that doesn't light me up .

Speaker 2 15:40

This is the one , as parents , that can get us a little bit , you know , as humans really . But I think about it through a motherhood lens , because we've got these obligatory birthday parties or homework , or you know different things that our children need and want and etc . And then we've got this balance of well , does this feel really good for me ? Joining the PTA , go into the birthday party , go into the third play date of the week . I'm finding that I'm saying no more and more to things like that because it doesn't align for me , and so I'm curious where that balance of , like giving your kids what they need and want and , you know , really honoring what I need and want , like where's that line ?

Speaker 1 16:29

Well , I would say , when a kid is really , really young , like zero through five , you are literally just keeping them alive , you know , because they're just getting into trouble and they're getting into things that could be dangerous . So you know , as a mom , young mom , that's your number one priority their safety , feeding them , clothing them , giving them shelter . I think that's , you know , your priority . You know , until they're 18 , but really zero to five where they could , like , endanger themselves . So it's a very vigilant era , right . But also the little things , like the PTA meetings . You know there's a lot of alpha women that left their career to raise kids and they still have ambition and drive and they put all that ambition and drive into being the president of the PTA , making sure their kid has the healthiest , most organic lunch , like being the mom who only you know , puts her kids and organic cotton clothing or whatever . So just let those women win and know that those are not your battles right now .

Speaker 1 17:47

Yeah , and you know , if it doesn't really light you up , I still will say the same thing .

Speaker 1 17:52

If it's not your child's safety and keeping them alive and healthy and on the planet , if it's just little things , you know , if you have to go to a birthday party and your kid really wants to go , then go .

Speaker 1 18:04

But maybe you know you are not at the birthday party the whole time because there's other parents there .

Speaker 1 18:10

Maybe you are like running a couple errands and picking the kid up at the birthday party in a couple hours , like you don't have to be at every single thing when there are other adults there present , especially a lot of adults . Like at a birthday party you can also go to the car during the birthday party and do like a guided meditation for 10 or 15 minutes if you're exhausted . You know because the reason why I tell women don't do anything out of fear , obligation and guilt , because when we show up burned out and when we show up depleted and exhausted and like oh , I can't believe it's another kid's birthday party , why are they all born in the same month ? Right , Then we're not really being our best self , we're not being of service , we're not being joyous and gracious to the other kids or the parent who's hosting . And it's better to refill your tank and show up to things where you are actually giving from your overflow , not showing up and depletion and burnout .

Speaker 2 19:16

I think this is a good segue to talk about the concept of balance , and I once had a coach , many years ago , tell me that there's no such thing as balance , and I can't let it go because I'm like , yes , there is . I'm like a rebel at heart and so I want to like argue how right I am , but I practice yoga . I know like there's like this . I almost feel like it's like a universal law of balance , like we . There has to be balance in the universe in my opinion , and so I've been on this like journey to deconstruct what this means in my mind , in my life , and you talk about seven pillars of abundance , so it's seven areas of our lives . How do we balance all those areas of our lives and why are you so invested in like balanced as the way ? Let's break that down a little .

Speaker 1 20:10

Yeah , I really think that there are seven key areas of life and they are spirituality , health and fitness , emotions , romance , mental , social and financial , and you don't have to do all seven areas every minute of the same day . I think of it more as like harmony rather than balance . If you think of seven instruments in an orchestra , sometimes it's the saxophone , sometimes it's the flute , sometimes it's the drums Like there are different things that you focus on in different times during your day or your week . So I think when women think I have to do everything the whole exact on the same time schedule , they get mom guilt . They're like

Balancing Work, Motherhood, and Self-Care

Speaker 1 20:54

oh , when I'm working really hard , why am I not with my kids ? What are my kids doing ? Or when they're at home with their kids , they're like I'm letting all my potential go . I was so smart I could have this like kick-ass career and now I'm just a stay-at-home mom , like . So I think being present and being mindful of what you're doing while you're doing it is important , and I think of planning your week like a hit training class . High intensity interval training is when you do one exercise for a couple of minutes and then you take a break and you do one exercise for a couple of minutes and then you take a break . So you schedule your week and the thing that to me as a non-negotiable is the morning practice .

Speaker 1 21:40

I am a huge believer of writing in a journal . I'm actually gonna give this as a gift to your listeners . I met this woman named Janet many years ago at a 12-step meeting . She gave me these life-changing journal prompts . I've been writing these journal prompts out every morning . I added a few powerful ones of my own and I write every morning in an abundance journal . It's a non-negotiable . And sometimes I don't do it right when I wake up , like today . I was running a little late , so I'm gonna do it right after this podcast . Or , if you're really not a morning person , if you have little kids , do it while they're at school , do it when they're in bed at night . It doesn't really matter if you do it in the morning or the afternoon or the night , just do it every day . And I promise you guys , after 10 days you'll have a breakthrough , you'll have a miracle , you'll have a shift .

Speaker 1 22:30

So I do a morning practice every day which includes journaling , prayer , meditation , reading from spiritual literature . That's a non-negotiable . That's seven days a week . Five days a week . I'll exercise . So that's a second pillar of fitness .

Speaker 1 22:45

The third pillar is emotional . That's a constant mental discipline , kind of what I was saying about overwhelm changing my inner dialogue and my outer dialogue from a scarcity conversation to an abundance conversation , going from there's not enough time , there's not enough money , there's not enough energy to do what I need to do . I have plenty of time , I have plenty of money , I have plenty of energy . When I'm committed to something , my energy expands , time expands . So find that commitment in your heart . Get passionate about whatever you're doing , whether that's building a career or child-rearing or doing both , because there are awesome things to do and there are things that you can get really passionate and excited about .

Speaker 1 23:32

The next thing after emotion is romance , and we have my husband and I . We're newlyweds , we're coming up on two years of marriage . We have one date night a week , no matter what where . We leave our cell phones in the car , and we are connected and we're present . We also love to work out together two or three days a week and we love walking our new dog the dog's behind me , if you're watching this on YouTube we have a beautiful six-month-old black lab named Indigo . So romance is something that we cultivate every day , but we do have one date night a week .

Speaker 1 24:07

The next pillar , after romance , is mental , and that is something that you can do in the nooks and crannies of your

The Seven Pillars of Personal Transformation

Speaker 1 24:14

day . You can listen to an awesome podcast , like this one Raising Wild Hearts . You can listen to a YouTube video , an Audible . You can learn a new language . You can do practice , a new recipe . Anything that expands your mind doesn't take all day long . You can just listen to something while you're driving or doing household chores .

Speaker 1 24:35

The next thing is social , and I really feel that we are lacking in community right now . We're hiding behind our cell phones and our tablets and our computers , but we're not connecting , and now that we are allowed to have live events again , I would encourage all your listeners to try to go to live events . Get into a community , whether it's a yoga class or church or temple or anything . Whatever you think , the PTA , the neighborhood , whatever it is , women's networking groups join communities , because community creates immunity and what the world is , crazy as it is , community is really gonna lift you up , and when I went through a really acrimonious divorce where I was getting sued for spousal support after only three years of marriage , it was the women in my community that really lifted me up and carried me through .

Speaker 1 26:47

And finally , the seventh pillar is financial , and everybody thinks it's all about money because we're in capitalism and if I make a ton of money I can hire a personal trainer . I'll look really hot for my husband or my partner , I'll feel comfortable putting on my bathing suit , we'll go on a spiritual retreat in Costa Rica and we'll socialize with other couples and we'll get really spiritual and we'll do yoga together and we'll work on our mindset . So I , in my personal experience , money is the last piece of the puzzle to click into place . When I am spiritually and physically fit , in a harmonious relationship with friends and my husband , when I am working on my mindset , I will attract opportunities . I will attract people , places , things , situations , clients , and that is why I call myself the magnetic abundance mentor , because when you have your area and alignment in these seven areas , you will magnetize people to you , they will be drawn to you and life will get a lot easier . The goal is to create abundance with ease and grace , not to make your life harder . So that is my long explanation .

Speaker 2 28:08

Yeah , that's great . It's all you know . It's all so nuanced too . I love that you point out that finances aren't actually about the money . I mean , money is like a made-up system that we've created to trade for goods and services that we value . So I think that's something that's really important . So if somebody comes to you and one or two , let's say , areas of their lives are like totally in the tank , like just like non-existent suffering , like how do you coach somebody to take those just like baby steps to get that back into alignment ?

Speaker 1 28:50

I would acknowledge them first for knowing that one area of their life is in shambles . I actually have a really fun free quiz on my website , rebeccaliswithwipmancom , where you just get to know in the moment if that area of life is in or out of alignment . But if something is really busted like you're going through divorce or bankruptcy or having a health crisis you know that that area is not going well . I would ask you , if you're my coaching client , what do you want to create in that area ? What is the ultimate vision for that area ? Let's say you're having a health issue . What does health look like to you ? How do you want to feel in your body ? What do you want to weigh ? How do you want to dress ? How confident will you feel when you solve this health issue , whether it's just weight or anything ? You'll feel confident when you're feeling vibrant and radiant in that area of your life , and what difference will that make in your life ? You have to create from a vision of where you're going .

Speaker 1 29:59

The next question is well , what is it going to take from you to create that vision ? What's going to change ? What actions are going to need to happen ? How can we take those actions together ? How can I hold you accountable to take those actions ? Because a lot of times we know what we need to do to get healthy but we just don't do it . It's easier just to stay in our old habits and our old ways . It's kind of like an old pair of jeans we know they're stained and have holes in them and out of fashion , but they just fit so good . It's about holding the person accountable and then just showing that person compassion and grace , because transformation is not just a direct line . It's like three steps forward , two steps back , five steps forward , one step back , one step forward , three steps back . It is a process and just to be gentle and compassionate with yourself , as long as you know what it is that you want to create in that area , just keep going and trust in divine timing that you will get there when you're supposed to get there .

Speaker 2 31:06

I think this is where the journaling comes into , because it helps us really take from our brain down to paper . It helps us define , maybe , what we're struggling with , and sure that gets it out . But then a step beyond that of like , okay , we're struggling , what would it look like if we weren't , what would it look like if we were really joyous in this area of our lives ? I think that's where your journal to everybody , your free journal gift , is going to come in handy . Thank you for that . We'll put that link in the show notes too . Do you find I'm so curious ? Because when I first started working with coaches in like 2018 , 2019 , I was going to them being like just tell me what to do . Just tell me what the fuck to do with my life . What should ?

Speaker 1 31:57

I do . I'm glad we can cuss on your podcast .

Speaker 2 31:59

Oh , yes , please Let him rip . I always put the E there just in case , because it just comes out . So I have pivoted from that a bit to like knowing that the answers are within me and finding that coaches , teachers , guides are really those people to point out our blind spots lovingly and , like you said , hold compassion for what we're going through . So how much are you seeing that people are coming to you , telling me , like , telling you , like , just tell me what to do , tell me how to fix my life ? Or are they taking personal accountability ? Or is that like a journey to realize that the answers are within them ? You're just this , like guide for the transformation .

Speaker 1 32:47

I think coaching and therapy are a little different , because therapists are , like , not allowed to tell you what to do , even though I know some do . They are just supposed to ask you thought provoking questions and I think coaching is really what the person needs , like if somebody really wants to be told like I have a program , seven steps , to manifest your soulmate in midlife . I basically just deconstructed exactly how I met my husband , reverse engineered it and I just give it to you on a silver platter . It's a roadmap . We walk through it . Of course there's personal growth . That happens in the process .

Speaker 1 33:23

But you know , some people are just like just show me how to meet my soulmate . Like I have found every . Everything that I'm doing is wrong . I'm going on all these dates . They all suck . I don't like anyone . They don't like me . I hate internet dating , I hate swiping . Like I'm just at my wit's end . Just show me what to do .

Speaker 1 33:43

And some people really want that roadmap and that is why a coach is different than a therapist . But then , along the journey of taking them through the roadmap , I asked them a lot of thought provoking questions so they can kind of see their old patterns , see their limiting beliefs , see how they want to reinvent themselves and show up differently . So to me , it's really a nice combination of giving them directed action , giving them homework assignments , but also letting them come to their own conclusion about how they want to show up and act and be differently , because we create from how we're being , not from what we're doing . People think it's have do be like I'll have my soulmate , will do cool things together and then I'll be happy . But it's actually be do have . When I'm being a loving , magnetic , amazing woman , I'll do things that attract my soulmate and then I'll have a long , lasting partner . So it's just , there's just little tweaks and shifts that we make in the journey .

Speaker 2 34:51

Right . So to me this is a conversation about manifestation . Would that be a correct assumption ? Yeah , absolutely Okay . So when we want something , or we say that we want something , we have to show up at our time as that person who is worthy , capable of holding , having the thing correct .

Speaker 1 35:16

Yes , we show up as what we want to be . So , to go back to the seven areas , I would tell your listeners to rank yourself on a scale of one to 10 in all seven areas of life and start showing up as if you're a level 10 , as if you do have a positive mindset , as if you are magically passionately in love with your soulmate , as if you are making six or seven figures as a stay at home or part-time working mom , whatever it is . You want to be it before you will attract it .

Speaker 2 35:52

Okay . So how much of that process has to do with going into the weeds of our childhood trauma , our limiting beliefs , all the shitty things that we've had to deal with in life ? Like are we ? Because there's a lot of spiritual bypassing . Is this popular term right now of like , oh , just like , be the magnetic person and get the thing you want , but then you don't actually go into , like the root of why you feel like I can't find the love of my life , and maybe the root is something that happened when you were four years old . But if you just go straight to this like pretending phase of be , like I'm just going to be what I want to attract , then does that thing get completely bypassed . So how much are you telling your clients to like go in the weeds and I know a lot of this is like can be therapy too , and psychotherapy and different tools like that but what about you from , like , a coaching perspective ?

Speaker 1 36:43

Yeah , I think what you're talking about is also called toxic positivity . Like , instead of feeling your pain and feeling your feelings , I'll just like paint a smiley face and start affirming what I want . And that doesn't really work because it's like I am going to manifest my soulmate today , but I hate men , you know . Like that doesn't really work . Like the universe knows that you're not really feeling it . So it's important to clean up your past , forgive , really , let go . And yeah , there's work that needs to be done . At first , you got to look at your childhood trauma . What happened age zero through eight ? What are your limiting beliefs ? What are your old stories ? Like , let's say it's about men . You know they just want one thing . All the good ones are already taken . They only want really young women . I don't have the right body , or I'm not the right , whatever , race , gender , I don't know anything . I'm too old , I'm too young , I'm too fat , I'm too thin . These are all limiting beliefs . So we have to go in the first couple of sessions to your limiting beliefs , change them , and I like to call it the four as of change .

Speaker 1 38:02

The first A is become aware of what your limiting beliefs are . What is your old story ? Because you could have the best coach and listen to all the best podcasts , but if you have a limiting belief , it's going to stop you from getting what you want . The second A is acceptance , like , oh , okay , I have this limiting belief and I probably had it since I was a little kid , and not to self judge . And the next A , after acceptance , is action . Okay , what am I going to do when that limiting , when I'm about to go on a date and I think this guy is not going to like me because all the guys that I like don't like me and the ones that like me I don't like , how am I going to shift that ? And that would be the fourth A could be affirmation , and that is affirm .

Speaker 1 38:54

Okay , when that old limiting belief comes up , I'm about to go on a date , I'm thinking this guy's not going to like me or I'm not going to like him . All the good ones are already taken . Just change that there are so many available men out there . I easily and effortlessly attract my soulmate . Dating is fun and easy , whatever it is , and that's something that I do on my coaching . I will help you come up with affirmations on the other side of your limiting belief , but first we have to really understand where they come from and talk about that and get that out . But I'm not a therapist . I don't believe in living in your childhood and living in your limiting beliefs and kind of sitting in that self-pity anger , because that doesn't serve you either . It's more about OK , what are they ? What happened ? Let's let that go , let's forgive and let's walk into what we want to create .

Speaker 2 39:52

Right . At a certain point something has to give , you have to let it go at a certain point it's not . You can't wallow in it forever , I mean . So that's the point that a lot of people miss in healing . We want to stay in that familiar state because that's what we've known and that's what's comfortable . So I love that you did the 4As .

Speaker 2 40:10

When I started therapy , like my first therapist that I ever went to , 10 plus years ago , did the awareness acceptance action . But she didn't have the fourth day , she just had the three , and so there was no affirmation , and so I love that piece added to it . That's gold . So let's see . So I'd love to pivot a teeny bit because this is really relevant for me in my life right now . You have a program , I believe , called Six Figure Side Hustle and you talk about the importance of having a side hustle following what your passion is . Can we dive into that a little bit ? Because for me I told you before we started recording

Side Hustles for Financial Abundance

Speaker 2 40:51

I , at a certain point in my motherhood journey , my husband and I decided that I would stay home and be the stay at home mom , and that was quite a rocky journey for me , and sometimes still is , depending on the day and what's going on .

Speaker 2 41:06

I started this podcast . I'm working on different passion projects in my life and in my mind I'm not striving . I'm looking at this concept of icky guy like what changes the world , what you're good at , and then what you can get paid for , because it's not just about having a hobby Like what can you actually do that you're great at , that the world needs that ? You can also have abundance from Financially speaking . So let's talk a little bit about financial abundance side hustles for these mamas who are child-rearing and kind of in the thick of it . How can we do both ?

Speaker 1 41:46

That is all about your schedule and structuring your day and what I like to call power hours . So while your kids are at school I know you have a two-year-old so you don't have a lot of downtime , but for those who have other kids in school , you can work during those hours and schedule power hours . Even if you schedule five power hours a week while your husband could watch your kid , you could create a business in five hours a week if you are really disciplined with your time and keep to your power hours . So you wanna , on a Sunday night , schedule your power hours , whether it's five , 10 , 20 hours a week , and then be protective about those power hours . Act as if you had a job in an office with a salary , and if somebody called you during those hours or if a kid needed your help , you would not be able to say yes . So schedule your power hours , set boundaries around the power hours and then within the power hours . I like a method called the Pomodoro method and that is 25 minutes of concentrated effort and a five-minute break . So if you can just focus for just 25 minutes and then take a five-minute break , you could check on your kid during that five minutes , go to the bathroom , stretch , check your emails , pet your dog and then come back . So power hour is actually 50 minutes of concentrated effort and a 10-minute break , and then , if you're not sure what your business should be , I do have a free quiz on my site .

Speaker 1 43:26

It's a Discover your Meaningful and Magnetic Purpose and you're welcome to take that free quiz . But you can also ask yourself questions Like what do I love to do ? What could I talk about for a half an hour without checking my notes ? What do I like to educate myself in ? Like what am I constantly Googling ? What am I listening to podcasts about ? What do I love to geek out on ? What am I really good at ? Like what do people come to me for advice in ? Are they asking me about recipes ? Are they asking me about how to buy a car ? Are they asking me about where they should travel , where they should go out to eat , where they should get their makeup ? Like what am I good at ? And then , what would I do if I really didn't have to work for money ? Like if I won the lottery or if I had a trust fund and I had more than enough money ? Like what would I do anyway ? And then you want to figure out a way to monetize that . And these are all really powerful questions to ask yourself and sometimes you know it might surprise you because you don't think about oh , what are people constantly asking me for advice in ?

Speaker 1 44:45

That is kind of how I came up with my seven steps to manifest your soulmate , because I'm into really into health and nutrition . I'm into health and wellness business , I'm into money . I have four businesses , I own real estate , I have a stock portfolio . I didn't really think about how I could serve people with my seven steps to manifest your soulmate but I was like well , my girlfriends are always asking me for advice in their love life . And another great question to ask yourself is like what do you want your legacy to be ? That's another great question . What do you want people to say about you when you're no longer on the planet ? Like , she really helped me with blank and these are all really really good questions . I had another one on the tip of my tongue and I'm forgetting it , but these are all really really good questions to ask yourself to find a great side hustle . And then my programs helps you launch that into a real business and monetize it Awesome .

Speaker 2 45:51

I love that . I love those questions I think often we can get . I've done this in the past . I've looked kind of outside of myself and seeing these different coaches or different mama pernures doing this kind of side hustle on Instagram or on social media and I've been like , oh , I want to do that , I could do that , instead of looking within to figure out authentically for me what is the thing , what is the medium . It's a podcast for me , as it turns out , where before I was like posting on social media and it didn't feel right and I never really loved it , and so , anyway , I just think I love that you ask these questions and allow people to kind of go within For those answers that are there . It just takes some prompting and some probing to figure out what that is , you know , oh , so I'm curious if you have like a one size fits all definition for success , like what is success to you and your life and how do you guide your clients to success as well ?

Speaker 1 47:00

Yeah , my definition of success is the amount of joy that you feel . Because why do we want whatever it is we think is success ? Why do we want the happy marriage , the healthy family , the vacation home , the new car , the big income ? Because we think when I have this , I will feel happy . I believe that joy is the evidence of God and if you look at your two year old , he has more joy than anyone you know . He's got it figured out . Like you said , he has on wonder . Everything is like oh my God , mom , look at this , this is the coolest thing ever .

Speaker 1 47:44

He has joy and I think that's what we lose as we get older . We think it's our joy is outside of us and we've got to get something to feel worthy and to feel joyous . But joy is actually a paradigm shift . It's a decision , it is just a way of being where everything is just a privilege and it's about gratitude and it's just about how we look at life that we get to be here . We're so lucky just to be alive and be on the planet and we get to have all these great experiences , and life is temporary , so why waste any more time not being in joy ? I love that .

Speaker 2 48:30

So this morning I was my kids slept in , which liked to like a little bit before seven , and I was like , oh my God , I woke up and nobody was calling for me .

Speaker 2 48:42

Nobody was like , oh my God , this is so amazing . And so I was laying there trying to cultivate this feeling of gratitude and I'm like , okay , I'm super grateful that my kids slept in a little bit and , if I'm honest , sometimes it's hard to do it on command , like I was trying to get to this emotional state where I felt like super abundant and I felt expansive and I was bumping up against , like I know , I got to get up , they're going to be up any second , they're going to call for me , I'm going to need to make breakfast , you know , and I'm like , so I know , right , logically , that I need to cultivate this like joy , this like bliss and whatever . And then sometimes my brain is like , yeah , but you also have to do all of this . So I don't know what my exact question is here , other than like , how do we embody that feeling , even when we don't freaking feel like it ?

Speaker 1 49:41

Yeah . So I would say to , if you're in bed , going oh my God , I've got a like turn on gratitude before I do my day of all these activities for kids I would say to get into your five senses , just being really grateful that you're feeling your bed , that it's soft , that you have soft sheets , that you have bedding , so that would be feeling . What are you seeing ? You're just so grateful that you can actually see that , you can see that nobody needs you At the moment , that you actually can be with yourself . What are you listening to ? Oh my God , I don't hear crying . I don't hear screaming . There's actually peace in the house . Wow , that's a different sound . I don't usually hear nothing . Wow , this is what peace sounds like .

Speaker 1 50:28

What am I tasting ? What am I going to have next ? Like , am I going to make coffee ? Am I going to have orange juice ? Am I going to have tea ? And then I think that's all five senses . But , yeah , get into your five senses . What am I seeing , what am I tasting , what am I feeling , what am I touching and what am I listening to ? And that will ground you in the moment and ground you in your gratitude practice . And then , okay , you're being mindful , you're in your body and then you get out of bed and you can just stay in that mindfulness and I think when we are in our five senses , we're present and we're in the moment versus being in our head .

Speaker 2 51:08

Thank you . I recently took a leadership class it was , I think it was called Head and Heart Leader I forget the woman's name who created it and I was very surprised to learn that I lead from my head and I'm like , wait a minute , I thought I was very heart centered , but I , you know and it's not necessarily like hard and fast here , but it gave me a lot of insight to you know , my leadership style and I do go a lot from my head , like I was a great student in school and so I like I feel comfortable in this , like logical , you know , intelligent , researching place and to drop into my body and just being in the flow like a very feminine essence , is like something I'm opening myself to do more and more . So that is super helpful . Just thinking about it like in the five senses realm , that's amazing .

Speaker 2 52:01

Joy is the evidence of God . I mean , that is amazing . And how much joy can we feel in a day ? Right , you know , if we think about it like that , then our problems don't seem so big . Even if they are kind of big , they seem a little less , um little less big . You know , I love that . So , as we kind of start to wrap up here . I would love to ask you a few questions that I ask everybody at the end , rebecca . And the first question , which is kind of a bonus question that I've added in recently , is if you could teach a class to a group

Teaching Conflict Resolution to Kids

Speaker 2 52:39

of elementary aged kids tomorrow , what would you teach them ?

Speaker 1 52:45

Oh my God . I have been on over a hundred podcasts . These questions are so fun . I've never been asked this . What I would teach them would be conflict resolution , because I think that so many people do not know how to resolve conflicts . People have grudges , people like abandon their family members and lovers and great relationships because they don't know conflict resolution . So , I would teach the kids how to resolve a conflict by using the sandwich method . And that's compliment , criticized compliment Okay got it .

Speaker 2 53:26

So I love the way you blank . And then , but this isn't going to work for me . And then I really love that you're willing to listen to me about this and then ask for what you want . And then ask for what you want . Is this similar to like a nonviolent communication ? Does it kind of go on the same ? Yeah , yeah , yeah , okay .

Speaker 1 53:45

Yeah , I like , I love , I love that you exactly , I love that you blank . However , I'm not comfortable with blank , so will you consider doing blank ? And again , you're just a wonderful , wonderful blank , you know , and it's just so simple . And so many people don't have conflict resolution . So they either go silent and they ghost people or they get angry . And yeah , I think that would change the world if kids learned the sandwich method .

Speaker 2 54:19

I agree , and in our homes too . You know I with siblings like we've got sibling conflicts and you know thinking about that for them , to help them , you know , to help , to guide them in a way to like do it with each other , like oftentimes I feel like a referee , like waving the flag , like taking sighs , like you know mom loves you more . It's like , oh my God . So , yes , like just a very neutral , like method would be super helpful . Love that . The second question is what , if anything , are you reading right now ?

Speaker 1 54:55

I wish I would read more . My husband reads more books in a year than I've read since I graduated from college 30 years ago . Okay , I am . The reason why I teach burnout is because oh , that's the thing that escaped my mind that I wanted to tell your listeners about their passionate side hustle is who were you before your transformation ? That's who you can serve . So before my transformation , I was someone who was burned out . That's why I love helping women go from burnout to bounce , beautiful and abundant . So I'm like a compulsive overdoer . I have four businesses Like I have to be productive every second of the day and even though , like , self-help is considered very productive , I would rather listen to an audible than sit down and read . Yeah , so what am I reading now ? I am actually reading a cookbook that is by Sean Stevenson . Oh , that's on my list . It's on healthy eating and how to have , like , more family time around the table . Uh-huh , just got it . I'm reading that .

Speaker 1 56:05

I'm reading a cookbook and then I have so many like , because I also have a podcast and I have a lot of business people and sales people that have sent me so many books that I couldn't even tell you off the top of my head what their titles are . I know it sounds terrible , but I really want to read them . So , yeah , if you think I'm like some kind of an ascended master that has like the perfect schedule where I read , no , but I am enjoying Sean Stevenson's cookbook right now Awesome .

Speaker 2 56:38

I'm so glad you said that it's on my list . It's in my cart One of my things . I'm one of my apps . Okay , the next question is what's bringing you joy today ?

Speaker 1 56:49

What's bringing me joy today is what's behind me . This , uh , the six month old beautiful black lab , indigo Hi indigo , she's so pretty , thank you .

Speaker 1 57:01

What's bringing me joy is today is I have two social visits scheduled . Usually , I only do like one a week . I'm seeing a friend that I've been friends with for like 20 years and we're going to go to a 12 step meeting , um , and then grab a bite of lunch . And then I'm also meeting a new friend across town for coffee where we might be collaborating on my health and wellness business . That is really exciting to me . I really love , uh , connecting in person versus zoom , and the fact that I have two in person meetings today with women that I really like and respect is going to bring me a lot of joy today . This podcast brought me a lot of joy . I loved our conversation and , um , eating healthy always brings me a lot of joy , being very conscious about what I put in my mouth .

Speaker 2 57:56

Mm . Hmm , before I ask you the last question , will you tell us where we can find you and follow you ? I know you dropped links throughout , but what's the best place to connect with you ? Sure ?

Speaker 1 58:06

Um , the best way to find me is through my link , tree link , which also has the abundance journal , the podcast . I do a free women's circle where I offer uh coaching , accountability and support every week , uh , tuesdays at 12 Pacific , three Eastern . You can always jump in there and just get some coaching and meet some great women . Um , that's all of my link tree link . If you want to go directly to my website , rebecca Elizabeth Whitmancom , and if you want to talk to me on social , it's at Rebecca E Whitman . Uh , for Instagram Twitter clubhouse threads , make sure you put that E in Rebecca E Whitman .

Speaker 2 58:48

Awesome . And then the last question is who or what have you learned the most from ?

Speaker 1 58:56

I love that . Um , I would say my number one spiritual teacher has been a gentleman named Michael Beckwith .

Michael Beckwith and Spiritual Growth Learnings

Speaker 1 59:04

He is the founder of Agape International Spiritual Center . He's a bestselling author . I was so honored that he also endorsed my book how to make a six figure income working part time , and I have just been studying his teaching since 2003 . So now for 20 years and a lot of uh . What I teach and why I am joyous when I am joyous is because of what I've learned from him . And he's also a spiritual mentor to Sean Stevenson , who's uh , who's uh , the current book that I'm reading . So he's uh , just a great thought leader and a wonderful teacher for me . And he officiated my first wedding , which was a huge honor . Uh , the marriage didn't take , but it was an honor to have him as my wedding officiant .

Speaker 2 59:55

Amazing . Thank you so much for the work you're doing in the world and showing up and bringing us your wisdom . We really really appreciate you , rebecca .

Speaker 1 1:00:03

Thank you for having me on your show . This has been an amazing conversation , Ryan . A photo crew . Photo shoot for Sarah da .

Speaker 2 1:00:12

Copycat you .